Finally: The course
Be polite
By now you have learned that golf is a game of many rules and customs. You will not be surprised to know that there are things you are supposed to say at given times - and that is one of the best ways of identifying a beginner. And the fact that your balls seem to have quite other flight properties than what the others are playing with.
Approaching the tee off for the first hole you should greet the other players and tell them your name. The order you play at the first hole can be determined by the order you are listed in the flight for the tournament. Otherwise you can ask the others: "What is your handicap"? and let the one with the lowest handicap tee off first. Some players throw a tee up in the air between the players and whoever the sharp end points to decides who shall play first.
And off you go
As the game begins you may - but must not - announce to the other players what kind of ball you are playing. It is your responsibility to be able to identify the ball. To be sure that you can recognize it, you should mark it with a pen. The custom is that you state the label and the number of the ball as you place it on the tee: "I am playing a TourEdition 3". ("TourEdition" is the label, and each ball has a number, usually from 1 to 4, but I have also seen 0 and 5. These numbers have no significance other than to help you identify the ball).
As the first player is about to tee off - but without disturbing his preparation - you should say: "Have a nice game". The other players repeat the well wish to everyone else.
If the ball seems to be lost or out of bounds, you can suggest to the unlucky player: "I think you should play a provisional ball", so that he does not have to go back and play the ball again, if in fact it is OB (Out of Bounds) or cannot be found (lost).
As the flight (the group of maximum 4 people playing together) leaves the first tee - or as the group moves from the yellow (men's) to the red (women's) tee, the flight that will follow them usually repeats the wishes of "have a good game".
If one of the men does not hit the ball as far as past the red tee markers, he is supposed to buy a round of beer at the club house when the game is over, so he will expect to hear "proost!" or "Cheers" as the ball makes a pitiful "ladies". It is enough that one person reminds him of his obligation - and it is usually said in a humorous tone of voice and should be accepted with a smile by the unlucky player.
If the first shot is really bad (short or out of bounds), you may be allowed a ?Mulligan?, i.e. the shot can be repeated without penalty. Mulligans are of course not allowed in tournaments, and usually they are only given on the very first shot of the round. (There may also be special rules about Mulligans on the golf course: ?No Mulligans permitted?).
On the way from the tee to the hole, you may advise other players about the rules: what to do if the ball is in a water hazard or that he is not allowed to drop anything in the sand bunker (such as the Putter he brought with him to use for the next shot as the ball lands on the green). However, you are not allowed (during a tournament) to advise your opponent on how he should play the shot, what club to use or how far the distance is from the ball to the bunker. This is called giving and receiving advice ? and both players will be penalized (see rule number 8). You may tell your opponent the distance from a fixed point (such as a tree) to another fixed point (such as the water hazard), because this can be found in the birdie book (the book you can buy at the pro shop, which helps you plan your game).
Be careful with what you say
Sometimes it is difficult to hold back when you see the other player obviously picking up the wrong club or aiming directly into the bushes ? but hold back: he may have other plans for the shot than you, he may hit the ball shorter/further than you usually do ? and he may compensate for the way he usually swings. In a game I once offered advice on how to play the ball out of a fairway bunker, saying that I thought it would be possible to hit the green from this distance. My fellow player had asked me for advice and took it ? agreeing. But as he missed the shot and the ball ended up out of bounds, he had changed his mind and told me that he ?should have played it differently?. Of course I was left with the feeling that he was blaming me ? and should have kept my mouth shut.
In games where you play with a partner, such as scramble, you may help each other to read the putt line, agree on where the break is and maybe on the strategy of a careful lay-up first and then high-risk shot to hit the green. But if you are playing with others that you do not know very well, the best thing someone can say to you is: ?Play the ball the way you think is best.? Being a mediocre player, you may not appreciate that someone advises you to make a difficult shot over the water, over the sand and trying to land the ball on a very small area of green.
If someone plays a great shot, then be happy ? even if it means that you may loose the game to her ? and compliment the shot: ?Wow! That was a great shot.? And if the shot was not very good you may say: ?You got it out (of the rough, of the bunker?)? or tell her that ?It is on the fairway?. But do not repeat this if the player makes many bad shots.
And another thing: if you are the one that has a bad day on the golf course. Do not tell everyone about it. It destroys their joy of the game and it embarrasses them that you are playing bad while they are doing well. The best thing you can do is to show them that you (as a bad player) are enjoying their company, their success and cannot wait to make a wonderful shot the next time. As someone said: ?Hit the ball. Forget it. Walk.?
The lucky bird
If you happen to make a birdie, you are supposed to pay a round of drinks for the flight when the game is over. And if you happen to make a ?hole in one?, you are supposed to pay the drinks for everyone that (may) have seen the shot: your flight, the one before and behind you. If it is a tournament ? you are to pay the round for everyone that played that day. The unspoken rule is that ?ladies? and ?birdies? are only paid once per player ? but the flight may have 3 ?ladies? when they get back to the clubhouse.
As the round ends, you wait until everyone is finished and then ? removing your glove from your (left) hand, holding the putter in the left hand ? you shake hands with everyone else and tell them how much fun you had, and how you enjoyed their company. This handshaking is happening on the 18th green, and is the only time when your flight does not get off the green at once.
Of course you do not spend much time there this time either, because the players in the flight behind you are ready to take their shots to end their game, count their scores and have a drink at the clubhouse.
Fore!
